Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
