And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Are we still banned from the library?
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
