I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
