Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
