3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
