in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
meet me or not, i'm out of control
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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