Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
