Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
