he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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