I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
