last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Randomize
