UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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