my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
