I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
