i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
