I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
