3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I hate all girls vehemently.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
