Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
