soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
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