just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
