If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
