Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
