Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
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