super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
