i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
