Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Found your dick twin last night
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
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