I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
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