got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
