Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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