Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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