the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Randomize
