i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
