you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Randomize
