could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize