:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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