I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
Randomize