I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
