Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Randomize
