wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
she smelled like a LAN party
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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