Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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