Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Randomize
