KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
