Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
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