ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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