idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
i already hear my dad disowning me
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Randomize