You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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