Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
where are you?
Hypothermia
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
