before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Terrible idea I love it
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
