well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
