they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
He's on the porch naked. Help.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
