I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
